Nov. 18
Today I am grateful that my dad is feeling better physically, and in better spirits professionally. And that he loves me.
Nov. 17
Today I am grateful that all the protesters and all the police I encountered today behaved with respect for each other.
Nov. 16
Today I was grateful for my new flowers. Mostly I was appreciative of them, but I'm grateful that I can appreciate such a simple thing, and they were kind of an odd find: they were all in a bucket of matching bouquets, but 11 of them are salmony flame colored, and one is white. it is amazingly beautiful. So thank you universe, for giving the grocery store the an odd number of scarlet roses, and putting them right in my path.
Nov. 14
Today I had a lot to be thankful for.
When I got up, I was thankful to have my favorite hoodie back from the cleaners and looking nice and clean. I had a good and short day at work, and I caught up with friends I haven't seen in months. The weather was beautiful, and I found out about a great little hideaway bar that was quiet when I very much needed quiet. For a while today, I felt bad about not accomplishing what I intended to, but looking back, it was a very good day.
Nov. 13
Tonight, I'm grateful to have a local bar that will make me a hot toddy, and then play me a traditional session. And Paul, for being awesome and getting me there.
Backtracking, Gratitude, and a Little More
It is currently about 10pm. I am in my bed, in my pajamas. It's a strange life when choosing to go to bed early feels empowering. It makes me realize just how little I take care of myself. There are parties to go to, and people to go out with, and theater to see tonight, and I am going to bed. I cooked some food, watched some Star Trek, and did a little housework, and that is all. My excuse for not hanging out is extremely lame, and I just don't care. I also had a nap this afternoon, when I was supposed to be planning the evening and doing the housework.
Nov. 12: Today I am grateful for naps.
Unfortunately, I missed posting the last 3 days in Gratitude Practice. I've been running myself ragged, a thing that happens when I get depressed. But even though I missed the strict letter of the discipline (and even though that's a very valuable part), I did think every day of things to be grateful for. I did keep the discipline in my heart.
Nov. 9: I was grateful to have a strong working body, and a very cool boss.
Nov. 10: I was grateful for a pleasant and productive time in the theater, and for being let out early.
Nov. 11: I was grateful for Paul, who bought me beer and chicken, and let me sleep on his couch when I was too tired and depressed to try to take the train back home to my wretched empty apartment.
Now I am going to sleep for 8 hours, and get a whole bunch of more stuff done tomorrow. Ways to feel better: sleep, take vitamins, exercise. I intend to do all of these.
Nov. 8
Today I was grateful for the gorgeous warm weather, and being able to get out of the building twice. Also, for daylight savings and having sunshine when I woke up.
Nov. 7
Today I was grateful that even though things were getting screwed up and behind at work, I didn't tweak out. Yay learning and growing!
Nov. 5
Yesterday I was grateful that I got to see a whole bunch of good friends that I don't see often, and in small enough groups that I could appreciate them. Lovely people, who care for me inexplicably, and in the face of plenty of problems of their own.
Nov. 4
Today I was grateful for all the wonderful neighborhoods that I'm able to move between in one day on an unlimited metrocard. So beautiful and so unlike eachother. And for Daniel Gregoire, for showing me beautiful things I have never seen before. Architectural and personal.
Nov. 3
Today I am grateful for free WiFi and my slowly but surely growing ability to know where I am in the West Village.
Today was hard to be grateful for.
30 Days of Gratitude: Nov. 2
Today I am grateful that I am able to work with such fantastic women. And also for showers and warm cider with exactly the right amount of whiskey.
I Have Opinions ...and Gratitude
Apparently, I don't have opinions: not strong enough ones to keep up a blog. But something needs to be here, and it's November first, and I could use a stronger spiritual practice: the brainstew has been winning lately.
Thus begins my Thirty Days of Gratitude practice.
Nov. 1
Today I am grateful that I finished work early enough to ride the subway home in the afternoon sunshine. It was beautiful and warm.
I can do thirty days of this.
Connectivity
This morning, the City felt good.
I don't mean a pretty girl smiled at me on the subway, or the pavement cracked open into a giant grin, or the heatwave broke. I mean when I stepped out of Port Authority, the sticky air wrapped me up and the beat in my headphones landed just as I hit the bottom stair. The buses lined up along 42nd St. with absolute clarity of purpose. The concrete resonated. The light bent. All the skirts of the women on the sidewalk swayed together, and me in my cut-off jeans finding the holes in the traffic
I have never wanted to be in my city more, and I have never wanted to be myself in my city less. I want to be a silent antenna, a lense, a wanderer.
